don't feed stale bread to the pigeons
by prince kouha
Summary: Modern AU. "I-I-I'm sorry. Please don't sue me for sexual harassment," he mutters, a blush tinting his cheeks as his companion lets out a giggle, "I barely know you. I'm dull and not nearly as interesting as you are. But you just said that I should start taking charge of my life and adding a little color to the grey, and I'd like to start doing so."


Koumei has never really been one to hold the spotlight.

The middle child, from an early on age, has accepted his fate of a mundane life. He knows that he is intelligent and works to the best of his ability, but unlike his brothers nothing has ever really sparked his interests. Life is a blur of neverending grey, and he's never really had any strong goals or a motivating drive.

His lifestyle is instead pulled and shaped by the people around him, and if born more aggressive just as his eldest sibling Kouen he would have broken away a long time ago, but Koumei accepts that he's more of a follower than a leader because a leader needs his followers to be successful anyway. Maybe it's kind of sad that he's never pushed himself to be on top, but he's always been more of the one working in the shadows and helps to plan, to make situations progress and to actual have them happen.

He doesn't mind his lackluster routine in being an office worker for his brother's company, while Kouen is the CEO and Kouha is off living his crazy, rebellious college life before joining them. What matters most to him is that his brothers can rely on him and are happy, and he loves them too much to even think about parting ways with this career. Exciting has never really been his forte anyway.

Of course, he's a little bored, and of course, he yearns for more. He accepts his life, but that doesn't mean he is completely satisfied, because going to the same coffee shop every day for the same espresso, taking the same train and sitting in the same seat, and working into the wee hours of the night in the same bleak and graying office gets old and exhausting. Sometimes there is gossip, some days there are birthdays and drinking parties with his coworkers, and sometimes Kouha stops by with his flamboyant and teasing demeanor, adding color to his usual grey, but all in all Koumei feels as if he's just another statistic.

It is his fate, but he never really thought that everything would be this depressing until he actually started living it.

He groans when the alarm wakes him, red hair a mess as he pushes the snooze button and tries to deny that this is the life he's in, deciding to delay his awakening for once and indulging himself in much needed sleep. He really doesn't want to commence his morning routine today, but it's still only wednesday and he knows that he can't escape. What else can he do? He doesn't feel like calling in sick, and Kouen knows when he's lying so there's absolutely no point.

It's worse today, though. It really isn't his day. For one, he's slept in fifteen minutes more than usual and that means he's fifteen minutes late, and his overpowering brother does not accept anything less than perfect.

He groans and almost falls off the bed, his hot water refuses to work in his morning shower, he trips over his feet when he's cursing to go back into his room and takes five more minutes than usual to stumble upon his suit that the frustration makes him unable to put on properly, and he swears that it takes about fifteen tries before his tie is properly done. It essentially seems like everything has gone wrong before stepping out the door.

During the dash out his apartment building, he barely pays attention to anyone, rushing to his usual coffee shop to grab the same damn espresso. He thinks about skipping it, of course, but there's no way he can function without it and Kouen would rather have a late brother than an incompetent one. He's completely wiped out when he gets to the door, and he's about to open it when his day gets about five times better.

What happens should really make it worse, but for once, Koumei doesn't follow the norm.

The next ten seconds feel like a blur. A couple of blinks later, there's coffee on his shirt that he can feel through the cloth, and he's more concerned that it's going to leave a fucking stain later rather than the fact that it burns. He's about to yell, but he's never really been one to get angry and if he yelled he'd be damned, because the woman in front of him has got to be the most beautiful sight he's ever seen.

Black hair falls down her back, blue eyes bright and worried, a beauty mark on the edge of pursed cherry lips, with a tight blouse and pencil skirt that emphasize her assets as a melodic tune fills the air as she opens her mouth in distress.

She touches his shoulder and Koumei finally thinks he understands Romeo and Juliet's fruitless tragedy, because he swears that he's fallen in love at first sight.

"I'm so sorry sir! Are you okay?" she inquires, and Koumei bites back down a blush that's beginning to rise in his cheeks.

"I'm uh, fine, thanks," he mutters, never really being good with strangers, especially beautiful women like the lady in front of him, "S-S-Sorry for bumping into you."

She smiles in return, and he gulps because she looks even prettier than when her brows are furrowed and she's frowning, "No, no. It's my fault, I'm sorry for not looking at where I was going. I was in a rush."

He chuckles when she takes out a napkin and tries to wipe the stain, although he's also a little nervous at their close proximity even if he's not a teenager anymore, "What a coincidence. So am I."

"We're both in a hurry, but let me at least buy you a coffee to make it up to you!" Kouen can wait for now, because he's been graced with a beautiful stranger to make up for the start of the day being terrible, and the stranger smiles when he responds with an "I'd like that."

Maybe it's a sign that today might progress a bit better, so when she asks what he wants that he'd like a cappuchino, and it's a bit sweeter than what he's used to but so is the sight on his eyes in front of him. He's surprised, though, when she orders a foreign type of tea with some spice he's never heard of.

The people he's met are usually as boring as him, with few exceptions such as Kouha, an acquaintance named Judal, and his younger sister Kougyoku and her friends, so he's a bit happy that his routine has interrupted. They converse a little while waiting, and there's a flutter in his heart as he watches her walk away. Maybe he should have asked her for her number, but he's never really been too bold, and he's pretty sure he will never see her again.

He's okay with that because it lightens up his day a little bit more, having the pleasure of meeting someone so pretty and nice... even though, when he arrives at work an hour and a half late Kouen is at his office with a menacing aura as to why he didn't even bother to call in with a warning.

However, even after he receives his scolding, (and Kouen is intense with his chastising) he's still feeling a bit giddy, so on lunch break when he's sitting with a few co-workers he decides to join in on the fun and gossip about his brother. It's beneficial to Kouen too; knowing about his brother's obsession with his goatee and how once Kouha chased him around with a razor blade trying to shave it off will make them less frightened of him, anyway.

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Work progresses as usual, and for a while he forgets about the stranger because life is piles and piles of paperwork and Kouen's fucking secretary not doing her goddamn job. Koumei sighs, rubbing his temples at the lines he's been reading for hours upon hours when there's a knock on his door. Three times, concise, loud and straight to the point.

Kouen.

Oh geez.

"Okay, okay, I got you. You can come in," he calls, wondering what the hell he could want now. He loves his brother but admits that he can be a bit too demanding with deadlines and work, and it annoyed him at times. Being a CEO must be nice, bossing people around so much and whatnot.

Koumei is not prepared when his older comes in with the woman he met two weeks ago. She's looking astonished as well, blue eyes widening slightly, but a small smile follows when he attempts to greet her with a friendly grin.

"I just want you to meet my new secretary. This is Hakuei, and she'll be taking over the extra work you've been complaining about for the last couple of days," Kouen gruffs, a hint of smugness in his tone when Koumei's expression becomes sheepish, "I'll be leaving now, so help her with getting settled in, you lazy ass."

"Shut up," he groans after the elder steps out, and Koumei gets up from his desk to shake her hand. "Fancy seeing you here... Well, it's nice to meet you again. I'm sorry for not introducing myself the first time. My name is Koumei."

She takes his hand, and her grim is firm although he notes that her hands feel really soft compared to his.. Damn, his skin's getting too rough, if only Kouha could lend him some of that nice lotion again, "It's nice to meet you too, formally, and not spilling at you with hot liquids."

He can't help the chuckle, and the thoughts that are appearing in his mind- that after so many years of being so bored his life would have some light to it. It could still be boring, and would probably be, but at least now there are chances of it being a bit more interesting.

In contrast to Koumei, who feels as if his atmosphere is nonexistent, Hakuei has this aura around her; it's bright, even luminous, and he feels like a teenager since this is the second time meeting her, but he can tell that she's the type of person one would constantly want to be around.

"Now, paperwork, the boss says? Let me get it off your hands. You look like you could use a nap right now. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." He leads her to his desk and helps her gather the papers into a folder, and before she turns away, she gives him a slightly flirtatious wink, "Your secret's safe with me. Good night, sweet prince."

After she shuts the door, he puts his head on his desk and groans loudly, taking advantage of his soundproof office and wondering if his brother would hate him for having a crush on his secretary.

x o x

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Hakuei does manage to make life a bit more lighthearted, if not interesting. After seeing that he brings the same cup of coffee with the same cup of espresso every day, she is appalled and has made it her habit to buy his morning drink, so that's one thing out of his routine. It gives him more time to nap on the subway, and the cups she brings him are always filled with surprises; he tries the tea she ordered, earl grey, and it's actually pretty decent, as well as a multitude of other liquids. When she starts bringing him sweet drinks such as those special, over the top Starbucks frappuccinos he tries to be nice and tell her those drinks are way too girly. His hair may be long, and his younger brother might rub off on him, but it was becoming a bit much.

She only frowned, and he regretted it as soon as he saw her expression. "I think you need them, though."

Maybe he did, but he didn't want her to tell him what he already knew.

Nonetheless, he enjoys her presence in his life very much. His initial thought is correct, and her atmosphere is absolutely lovely to be around, and with that he finds that it's becoming increasingly lonely spending all his nights at his apartment with delivery pizza and the occasional phone call to Kouha and Kougyoku. With his life being mundane, he's never really seen it fit to do something brash, but he finds himself trying to build up courage to ask Hakuei on a date.

She brings him a morning drink, something hot and smelling faintly of cinnamon, and his hands shake slightly when he takes it from her.

"Hey, anything wrong? I don't want you to be the one spilling something on me this time," she jokes lightly, and he smiles although he's still shaking, trying to muster up the words. She frowns when she sees that.

"Seriously, though. Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine. L-L-Listen, uh," Koumei is interrupted when his office phone rings, and he curses under his breath when he sees that it's Kouha as Hakuei watches the spectacle amusedly. He answers, accidentally pressing for speaker phone, and his brother's loud, brash, and slightly high pitched voice echoes throughout his office, a held back blush taking over his entire face when Kouha boldly says,

"Heh, soooo, did you grow some balls and ask that secretary out on a date yet?"

Koumei almost screams when he turns speaker off and can't look the said woman in the eye for the next couple of seconds. He's afraid to find out what her reaction is. He covers his mouth and whispers a "shove off" to Kouha, whose piercing laughter only mocks him and makes his ears ring, and finally looks at Hakuei's form. Her arms are crossed, and her face is so entertained that it reminds him of when his younger brother had him play his horror games and he couldn't sleep properly for a week.

"Are you free after work?" she asks, in a tone more saccharine than the concoctions of liquids she brings him every morning, and he can only dumbly nod as she smiles and replies with "good", watching her walk away and hanging up after Kouha wolf whistles and says something particularly lewd. His eyes flicker for a good thirty seconds before he pinches himself and asks himself if something that cliché actually happened.

When he walks by her at lunch and she asks him how his brother is, he knows it did, and he's elated although highly embarrassed. Oh well. At least his brother is actually useful to him for once.

x o x

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Dinner is fifty times more awkward than he expects it to be.

Of course, he already expects it to be awkward, but Hakuei is just so interesting and animated that he's not sure what to say. She's obviously having fun and not minding that he's quiet, and he learns things like how her little brother's severely overprotective just like his own ("If you want to live, then sleep with your eyes open for a while! If he finds out about this date, he might kill you, you know!"), how she's been around the world and tried all their different cuisines, to China and England and Fiji, ("China is so good, the culture and everything. You should try and visit some time. Peking duck is amazing.") while he's never left the country, and so much more that makes him so shocked yet so pleased that he's met someone who's so _amazing_.

He's glad that she's chattering but with all her words and daring adventures he feels so plaintive... so _ordinary_ in comparison. He knows that he is, but it still kind of stings and he doesn't think he deserves to be in such an interesting person's life with how saturated his grey is next to her luminescence. He's not exactly sure what kind of color she is, but he knows she's definitely bright and beaming.

After a while, she notices, and when her expression falters and she quiets down, he curses because he didn't mean for that. He wants her to keep talking, to keep that vivacity alive because he's not exactly an expert at that. "I can get carried away sometimes. I'm sorry. Please tell me about yourself!"

Cue in disappointment.

"Um. There's not really much to say. Especially compared to you," he laughs, meaning to be funny, but she only pouts at that comment and he wipes the sweat behind his neck on his napkin, "I'm really boring. I work at the company for my brother, and go drinking sometimes with coworkers and out with my brothers and sister. I like reading a lot, especially history and old military plans and such, and... feeding pigeons at the park sometimes, but that's basically it. I don't really have anything to my name. I'm... not really in your league."

He's not very appealing, he thinks to himself, not in the slightest. And the pigeon comment was lame, why did he even say that?

She probably wouldn't want a second date with someone like him, but at least he was honest, right? Some points for that? He watches her, anxiety rising in his core and sees her expression become unreadable until she frowns, and again, he's left with the thought that he hates seeing her sad.

"I don't like the outlook you have with yourself. I think you're quite nice and a good person, and have the potential to be so much more than you already are. I thought you seemed interesting when I first met you, actually. Maybe you think you're boring, but you shouldn't be so negative about yourself. I'm sure that your family appreciates you, and so do your coworkers and you affect people more than you think. It's difficult to come out of your shell, and I understand that, but you shouldn't accept that you're boring if you think so. You should actually try to change it."

It's a bit much to take in at first, but he knows that every word that comes out of her mouth is absolutely right. He shouldn't accept that he's boring. He yearns, but never actually does something to make it happen, and makes things happen for everyone but himself.

The silence that follows is especially awkward, and he fumbles with the check when it comes although she puts down her share and he's not sure if he should call it a date anymore since it seems like it's become a disaster. When they're about to get up he notices that she looks slightly glum. "I'm sorry, I was too blunt. I have that problem sometimes. I hope I didn't hurt you too much."

He takes a deep breath and looks away, unable to look her in the eye. "No, no. Actually, you're right. You're really right. I just didn't know what to say after that."

"Are you sure? I don't want to ruin anything between us. I do think you're great, you know."

His expression is a mixture of shock, ecstasy, and utter confusion after she says that. He realizes he probably looks really stupid after a few seconds of it.

His face heats up, and he puts his right hand over his head to cover up his face, and when she senses how embarrassed he is she cracks a grin, and he opens his mouth although she can't see it, "I think you're really great too. Really, really great. So, uh, yeah. But, no, thank you for that. I needed that. I really should start actually... doing things, really, instead of just being so passive about myself."

She manages a delightful laugh, takes her bag, and grabs his other hand to escort him out of the restaurant that they visited. He feels like he's being dragged along, although he's quite happy that she's holding his hand- but Hakuei is much more assertive than he is. "So, what park do you usually go to? You know, to feed the pigeons?"

When she turns back, her cheeks are flushed with pink, lips puffy and red, and her eyelashes look so long and sultry that before he knows it he's leaning in and before he knows it his lips are pressed against hers. God damn it, her lips are so soft. He really should heed to Kouha's advice and put on some lip balm.

"I-I-I'm sorry. Please don't sue me for sexual harassment," he mutters, a blush tinting his cheeks as his companion stops in her tracks and lets out a giggle, "I know, I barely know you, and I'm dull and not nearly as interesting as you are. But you just said that I should start taking charge of my life and adding a little color to the grey, and I'd like to start doing so."

He doesn't want to say the words that he's thinking, because it'd be right out of a trashy romance novel- _and you're the brightest of them all, Hakuei._ She's a lovely white, just as her name says, a white crystal- because after all, white is the presence of _all_ the colors.

"Oh and uh. Just go straight ahead. The park is right by my apartment. I have no idea if there are any pigeons there right now, but you never know. I hope you have breadcrumbs in your purse."

She looks straight at him, his eyes clouded with their usual doubt, but this time there's a sparkle of something new. She's not sure if it's hope or if she's awakened something dormant in him, but she welcomes it with open arms, letting go of his hand and wrapping her arms around his neck. They're in the middle of the sidewalk, and it's a scramble since everyone is getting home from work, but she couldn't be damned to care right now. Height differences are nice, but it's so much easier to kiss someone who's around your same height.

And this time, she's the one who leans in.

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** this is unedited and rushed at the end bc its 4AM and i still havent done my summer hwk i wrote this for a friend im sorry i love this rarepair WE love this rarepair this is probably terribly ooc i had better plans for it but then i was like naw son, i also havent written in months and i just really wanted to write about kouha trying to shave off kouens stupid ass goatee. seriously that goatee is dumb? ok sorry for the excuses anyway off to write a judal/hakuryuu thing or think about writing it bc this was 3800+ words of pure MEIEI and i used up all my writing inspiration for the past like next weeks woops anyway im rambling i wonder if anyone will actually read this besides ren lmfao**


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